"He was everywhere on Saturday afternoon, if the team achieve the success they deserve this player will be essential to their style of play. The pressing and off the ball work was crucial to the result and another piece of supporting evidence for his player of the year campaign."

Now you may think that I have taken this from a BBC Sport article from a literary luminary like Troy Deeney or Garth Crooks talking about Arsenal's Declan Rice and the quest for the quadruple, however it was in fact heard from a very anonymous spectator describing Jacket's all action display at the bridge on Saturday afternoon.

The Mens 2s are at the business end of the season with the chance for promotion going down to the final day so the order of business was goals, and lots of them. If you were watching the first half you would've enjoyed a feast of attacking play and a five goal haul which saw the Old Boys right backs score two goals - first Asa with a fantastic overlapping run and composed flick inside the post and once he was removed from the game by a split eyebrow the next right back up Theo Chandler plundered in at the back post to score following another flowing move. Mike Millane was not content with just tapping in past the keeper and decided he wanted to up the difficulty by only flicking high into the near post roof of the net, two goals was the haul on the day but the simple finishes to buy the boys a jug for a hat trick seemingly evaded him.

A goal from Toby Jordan which I frankly can't remember had us up by give in the first half and with Saffron Walden playing Maldon later in the day we needed another substantial haul to try and overturn the goal difference deficit heading into next week but what followed was an interactive art exhibition where our artists attempted to get as close to scoring a goal without the net actually bulging. Jesus scored in his words "almost a hat trick" which translates to no goals, Mike Millane got his protractor out again and decided to tick off most angles before deciding he didn't want to buy the boys some beers but our captain snapped us out of the experience by being awake to a loose ball and adding a sixth goal on the day. After our first right back was cruelly taken out of the game Theo Chandler went in to deputise but it appears that a curse befalls those in that position as a stray back hand shot up and caught T in the jaw and has left him on the soup and ice cream diet - We swapped a Theo for another Theo in our ranks with Theo Wood slotting in perfectly to cap off what was an excellent display across multiple positions.

Man of the Match went to Rhys who from defensive midfield swept up dangerous attacks and allowed the free spirit sweeper to roam wild and free across the field. Jacket of Shame was a masterclass in deflection from Millane and Jesus with Jacket scooping this prize for a mixture of the umpiring display and Riz's very clear opinion of my performance. Promotion hinges on bettering Saffron Walden's result by two clear goals on Saturday so I hope to see you all back at the bridge to celebrate the champion Mens 3s and the promotion hopeful Mens 2s.

Jacket